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I'm so not ready for this week to be over. AT ALL. In fact, I'd like to lodge a formal protest, that this week went by much too fast and I'd like at least 48 hours back.
The problem with this week is that I spent the first half of it utterly unable to focus, so I got absolutely nothing done, to speak of, until Thursday morning. I mean, really.
This week! It was so frustrating. I had a list as long as my arm of things I needed to do, and I couldn't get even the basics started for most of the week. So I spent the first half of the week feeling absolutely terrible and guilty and miserable, because I had Stuff! To! Finish! and I just - couldn't. I gave up at midnight on Wednesday, having accomplished none of the things I stayed home from interning to do. I'm trying to give myself permission to be not-okay when I need to be, but it's easier to tell other people than it is to allow for myself. Because I'm supposed to be Adult! and Together! Capable of cleaning all the things! BUT the semester is almost over (which is scary all by itself), and I have a Great History of having a nervous breakdown at the end of every semester. I managed to not do it last year at all, so maybe I have one coming, or maybe it's related to that almost-done-with-college-NOW-WHAT feeling on top of end-of-semester finals stress. I have to remind myself that I'm almost done. I have three papers (one very short, one half-done, and one 10 pages) and the stuff for my internship (not due until the end of December) and that's ALL. Easy.
Thursday morning I got up and put together the presentation I had to give Thursday afternoon, and that night I wrote two solid pages of a paper I'm pretty happy with. Three to go, but I feel like I can get it done without further issue. I have a reflection paper to write over the weekend (too bad I can't just turn in the Emily fic, since that was the ACTUAL reaction I had to touring the prison!) and then I have to decide if/what I'm going to do for my Women as Healers presentation. Which I don't actually have to do, because I'm getting an A in the class either way. (Amazing.) I was toying with the idea of doing a presentation on Fictional Women Healers, as represented in House, but I'd have to watch a lot more House to get a solid grasp of it.I know, my life is so difficult. Also, must get started on the research paper, which is due a week from Monday. SO SOON. But again, not much and not hard.
Did not a thing for grad school or future job huting, but today I discovered that the agency I'm interning with is hiring in my department, so I'm considering applying here. I like the people and the atmosphere here a LOT; I actually got invited out to lunch by two of the case specialists, which is something that's never really happened in an office I've worked in. It might be a position where I could get at least some of my grad school costs covered, too. Research! I must do some of it.
Knitting progress: very little! Nothing on the Seafoam Shawl, it's still waiting for fringe and lining; I still haven't finished the One Up Mushroom Baby Hat, I have two spots to sew on; I have the thumb and one finger finished on Beer Glove #1 (but I'm close enough to done to actually call it Beer Glove #1, and I started the pinky finger on the train this morning - see: it being after Thursday); I cast on for Ribbed Sock #2 and got maybe an inch of the cuff done; I did one (1) row of the Argyle State University scarf, which means I have one pattern repeat completed.
I'm not giving myself traditional goals for this week, other than 1) breathe, and 2) survive. Anything else is gravy.
I have this post I've been internally processing about the pathologizing of childhood, and you'll probably see it later this week too. (But don't be terribly disappointed if you don't.)
So that's me. How's all of you?
The problem with this week is that I spent the first half of it utterly unable to focus, so I got absolutely nothing done, to speak of, until Thursday morning. I mean, really.
This week! It was so frustrating. I had a list as long as my arm of things I needed to do, and I couldn't get even the basics started for most of the week. So I spent the first half of the week feeling absolutely terrible and guilty and miserable, because I had Stuff! To! Finish! and I just - couldn't. I gave up at midnight on Wednesday, having accomplished none of the things I stayed home from interning to do. I'm trying to give myself permission to be not-okay when I need to be, but it's easier to tell other people than it is to allow for myself. Because I'm supposed to be Adult! and Together! Capable of cleaning all the things! BUT the semester is almost over (which is scary all by itself), and I have a Great History of having a nervous breakdown at the end of every semester. I managed to not do it last year at all, so maybe I have one coming, or maybe it's related to that almost-done-with-college-NOW-WHAT feeling on top of end-of-semester finals stress. I have to remind myself that I'm almost done. I have three papers (one very short, one half-done, and one 10 pages) and the stuff for my internship (not due until the end of December) and that's ALL. Easy.
Thursday morning I got up and put together the presentation I had to give Thursday afternoon, and that night I wrote two solid pages of a paper I'm pretty happy with. Three to go, but I feel like I can get it done without further issue. I have a reflection paper to write over the weekend (too bad I can't just turn in the Emily fic, since that was the ACTUAL reaction I had to touring the prison!) and then I have to decide if/what I'm going to do for my Women as Healers presentation. Which I don't actually have to do, because I'm getting an A in the class either way. (Amazing.) I was toying with the idea of doing a presentation on Fictional Women Healers, as represented in House, but I'd have to watch a lot more House to get a solid grasp of it.
Did not a thing for grad school or future job huting, but today I discovered that the agency I'm interning with is hiring in my department, so I'm considering applying here. I like the people and the atmosphere here a LOT; I actually got invited out to lunch by two of the case specialists, which is something that's never really happened in an office I've worked in. It might be a position where I could get at least some of my grad school costs covered, too. Research! I must do some of it.
Knitting progress: very little! Nothing on the Seafoam Shawl, it's still waiting for fringe and lining; I still haven't finished the One Up Mushroom Baby Hat, I have two spots to sew on; I have the thumb and one finger finished on Beer Glove #1 (but I'm close enough to done to actually call it Beer Glove #1, and I started the pinky finger on the train this morning - see: it being after Thursday); I cast on for Ribbed Sock #2 and got maybe an inch of the cuff done; I did one (1) row of the Argyle State University scarf, which means I have one pattern repeat completed.
I'm not giving myself traditional goals for this week, other than 1) breathe, and 2) survive. Anything else is gravy.
I have this post I've been internally processing about the pathologizing of childhood, and you'll probably see it later this week too. (But don't be terribly disappointed if you don't.)
So that's me. How's all of you?
